Salon :: Tech & Business

Ask the pilot: From Clickair to CrazyJet, a meditation on the troubled state of airline names

Most people know that Lufthansa is the <a href="http://dir.salon.com/topics/airlines/">airline</a> of Germany. Fewer people know how to spell or pronounce it. I've seen and heard every conceivable variation, from the crudely phonetic ("Liftunza") to the inexplicable ("Lefthoonza"). It shouldn't be so difficult. Keep your vowels in order -- the "hansa" part has a short "a," and those of you who were watching <a href= http://dir.salon.com/topics/mtv/>MTV</a> in 1983 can think of "Ninety-Nine Luft Balloons," and remember that the "t" and the "h" form separate sounds, unlike the diphthong of "other" or "weather." Stress the first syllable slightly, and there it is, "LUFT-hansa." You're practically speaking German. <P>But of all the endless manglings, perhaps the most atrocious version is one heard dozens of times daily at Boston's Logan International Airport. The offense takes place on Massport's interterminal shuttle bus, and/or aboard the MBTA's Silver Line connection from downtown, both of which share a common audio loop that announces the occupants of each terminal. As the only airline pilot alive who doesn't own an automobile, I take public transportation to and from the airport. And every time the bus nears Terminal E, I clench my teeth and close my eyes as the tape goes through its alphabetical listing. It starts out fine. "This stop serves Air France, Aer Lingus, Alitalia, British Airways, Iberia ..." But then, here it comes: "Loof-THUND-za." <p>...</p><img src="http://feeds.salon.com/~r/salon/tech/~4/156211943" height="1" width="1"/>

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